Thought Id start this one going because its rather dead on this board at the moment and I suppose all my usual muckers are either at the Stella tennis event watching Dim Tim (lose again) or at Henly Regatta eating cucumber sandwiches (they wish,...NOT).

Anyway please feel free to just talk to yourself blast away and let it go on any company or subject you wish. Just wish Id thought of this one before.

cheers GF.

Church v Da Vinci code.

Da Vinci code wins every time

Apparently, church attendances since election have gone up.

Perhaps, due to more individuals thinking they needing absolution.

The Churches often used to own the ground pubs were built on and some churches have attached bars.

Not sure whether they sell spirits.

Trinity Church in Marlow is now the home of an excellent graphic design company. Arthaus premises

In a city near to where I live, a Catholic Church has been converted into a night club.
Most nights a week this place is a meeting place for under aged sex and debauchery.
Not much changed there then!

At least its heterosexual I assume!

G,

How often do you go.


You can always tell you wife you have been to church!

Assume the position?

There's an offer Fred

An atheist (haystack?) was walking through the woods.

'What majestic trees!'
'What powerful rivers!'
'What beautiful animals!'
He said to himself.

As he was walking alongside the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him.

He turned to look. He saw a 7-foot grizzly bear charge towards him.

He ran as fast as he could up the path. He looked over his shoulder & saw that the bear was closing in on him.

He looked over his shoulder again, & the bear was even closer.

He tripped & fell on the ground.

He rolled over to pick himself up but saw that the bear was right on top of him, reaching for him with his left paw & raising his right paw to strike him.

At that instant moment, the Atheist cried out:
'Oh my God!'

Time stopped.
The bear froze.
The forest was silent.

As a bright light shone upon the man, a voice came out of the sky.

'You deny my existence for all these years, teach others I don't exist and even credit creation to cosmic accident.'
'Do you expect me to help you out of this predicament?'

'Am I to count you as a believer?'

The atheist looked directly into the light, and said: 'It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian now, but perhaps you could make the BEAR a Christian?'

'Very well', said the voice.

The light went out. The sounds of the forest resumed. And the bear dropped his right paw, brought both paws together, bowed his head & spoke:






'Lord bless this food, which I am about to receive from Thy bounty through Christ our Lord, Amen.'

LOL

.

Whooooooooosh!

Did you see that? I hope you didn't miss it!

It was a robotic cheetah doing 18 mph.

Oh oh! Here it is again:

Anyone else think it's running backwards?

Perhaps that's why it's so slow.

This is me,

I usually guess most story endings and I was almost there with the 'make the bear a Christian', but never saw the punch line coming.

regards Greek

6 more soldiers killed in afg .why are they there fighting to save scum .
these are sub humans . just look at libya today they are now wanting to rule there own towns and break away from the poor areas . the uk and the usa should let and allow this people to destoy each other the same in all muslim countrys get out and close our borders and kick out all illegal immigrants

.

I just came across these superb pictures.

mna . they are not worth fighting for . they will only turn and stab us in the back
freedom of speech is not yet dead

I would pul the troops out of all muslim countrys full stop let them sort it out them selves