* M0NEY-AM G0LF DAY EVENT: 27 HOLES, INCL. SUSTENANCE & PRIZES (IN ADDITION TO M0NEY-AM SPONSORED PRIZES!) on: -
THURSDAY, 08 JUNE, 2006 *

So several months have passed... Based on the success of last Summer's Event at Longcliffe G.C., a few of you have asked me to take over the reigns from PTH and organise another G0LF M0NEY-AM DAY again based in the MIDLANDS. This is fairEST to the majority coming from all over the UK! From initial feedback (reflecting on 2005 36-Hole hot mid-Summer's day!), the popular view for a 2006 Event has been agreed, as follows: -

* Tea/Coffee on arrival.
* 9 Holes (4BBB 3/4 Stab.) Comp.
* Sandwiches/Lunch.
** 18 Holes (MAIN INDIVIDUAL (FULL HANDICAP) STABLEFORD EVENT) with M-AM and Golfing Prizes for Winners, incl. "Nearest-to-the-Pin" on the 9th. Hole and "The-Longest-Drive" on the 18th. Hole.
* 3-Course Evening Dinner (full waitress service), incl. coffee & mints + Prize Presentation/Mic. Table.

(** ADDITIONAL PRIZES from our generous SPONSORS include: - 3 months worth of Shares Magazine sent to the homes of EACH COMPETITOR every week. The Overall Winner will get The Money-AM Annual Golf Challenge Cup to keep for good plus 1 year's worth of Money-AM Level 2 service worth 357.50 + Vat. The Runner-Up and Third Placed Winners will each get a medal to keep plus 6 months' level 2.)

Venue: - H0RSLEY L0DGE G.C., Belper, Derbyshire (Championship Meadowland Course with American-type Greens). Refreshments will be in the On-Site Kingfisher Restaurant. Entry Fee is: - 60 per Competitor which will cover all of the above ** plus enough to buy some additional golfing prizes.
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For the golfers amongst you, MoneyAM is holding its annual Golf Day Event on Thursday 8th June 2006. This event, kindly organised by one of our users "markusantonius", will be taking place at the Horsley Lodge Golf Club, Belper, Derbyshire.

Entry fee for the day is 60 (payable in advance), which includes:

27 Holes of competition play
Refreshments throughout the day
Golf Prizes
MoneyAM Sponsored Prizes
Regards

MoneyAM Support
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Updated...
______________________________
PAID 6 Fliper (5.9)
PAID 9 Markusantonius (8.5)
PAID 13 Predateur (12.9)
PAID 13 MG (12.9)
*** 16 Rayrac TBC?
PAID(by moi!) 17 PTHolden (16.9)
PAID 18 BobColby (17.9)
PAID 20 EWRobson (20.0)
PAID 21 Canary9
*** Still Available ***
*** Still Available ***
*** Still Available ***
______________________________
* Subject to Available Tee Times? *
* Subject to Available Tee Times? *
* Subject to Available Tee Times? *
______________________________

marcus: Have MoneyAM put the e-mail out yet; there must be many enthusiasts amongst such a cultured and acumen-filled community!

No, not yet, Eric. Ian promised me that he would do it sometime this week..... ?

.......a long golfing joke..........

Four lawyers in a law firm lived and died for their Saturday morning round
of golf, when one of the lawyers was transferred to another city and it
wasn't quite the same without him.
> >
A new woman lawyer joined their law firm, and one day she overheard them
talking about their golf game. "I used to play on my golf team and I was
pretty good" She said "would you mind if I joined you next week?"
> >
The three lawyers were hesitant, but finally one man said it would be
okay but they would be starting pretty early at 6:30 am. He figured the
earlyTee-Time would discourage her immediately.
The woman admitted this might be a slight problem, and asked if she
could possibly be up to 15 minutes late. They rolled their eyes but said this
would be okay.
> >
So on Saturday morning she showed up right at 6:30 and wound up beating
all three of them with 2-under par round. She was a fun and pleasant person
during the entire round, and the guys were impressed! Back in the
clubhouse they congratulated her and happily invited her back the next week. She
smiled and said "Sure, I'll be here at 6:30 or 6:45."
> >
The next week she again showed up at 6:30. Only this time, she played
left-handed. The three lawyers were incredulous as she still managed to
beat them with an even par round despite playing left handed.
> >
By now the guys were totally amazed, but wondered if she was just trying
to make them look bad by beating them left-handed. She was again very
pleasant and didn't seem to be trying to show them up, however each man began to
harbor a burning desire to beat her.
> >
So by the third week they were determined, but she came 15 minutes
late! As they waited for her, they figured her late arrival was some petty
gamesmanship on her part.
> >
However on arrival she played right-handed and this time only narrowly
beat all three of them. However she was so gracious and so complimentary of
their strong play, that it was hard to keep a grudge against her for switching
hands or being late.
> >
Back in the clubhouse after they had a couple beers one of the men could
contain his curiosity no longer, and asked her "How do you decide if
you're going to golf right-handed or left-handed?"
> >
"Well I am ambidextrous and always have had fun switching back and
forth. Then when I got married, as we sleep in the nude, it gave me a new
opportunity for my morning golf practice." "When I leave I pull the
covers off my husband. If his you-know-what is pointing to the right, I played
right- handed; if it is pointed to the left, I play left-handed."
> >
"But what if it's straight in the middle?"
> >
> > "Then I'm fifteen minutes late."

> > :o)

Splendid marcus. But don't dare to tell it to the ladies, unless I am heavily sponsored. Reckon the Old peelers (the police, of course) will be the right audience.

Markus, are you up for a game next week? Horsley ok , around 1pm tee off

Next week might be difficult, Fliper. But free the following week: any day exc. Wed....?

Mark, my handicap is moving the opposite way to DGT at the moment (21.4), but with the weather improving and lots of club competitions coming up, I'm hoping to reverse fortunes.

Eric,

One safe for the ladies.

Married couple set off for the Sunday mixed, but on the way are involved in a crash....................... both killed.

They arrive at the pearly gates and are met by St Peter. He ofers to show them round and in conversation enquires what are their interests. They admit they were golf addicts.

We have a wonderful course here said St Peter, would you like to play ?

They said yes and duly played, they found the course absolutely fabulous, the tees immaculate, the fairways like velvet and the greens true and the pace to their liking.

After, in the clubhouse, the wife waxed lyrically about the course and what a wonderful game they had.

The husband glared at her and said, "you stupid woman, if you hadn't fed us all that health food rubbish for so long we could have been here years ago".

Padding omitted, but sure will redesign appropriately.

Predateur

A guys out playing on his own when he sees a woman playing on her own up in front. He goes to join her to find shes a real stunner. After a few holes she turns to him and admits she finds him attractive and that she lives in the house just behind the 8th green. So off they go, leaving the clubs for a wild afternoon.

The next time hes playing, again he bumps into her and again they only last a few holes before heading off to her house for a passionate afternoon. This happens quite a few times over the next few weeks until one time suddenly he panics, realising his wife was picking him up and he was very late.

He rushes to get dressed, runs across the course, heading straight to the car park, where his angry wife is waiting. He decides that the right thing to do is to come clean and admit whats hes bean upto. So when she asks why he's so late he explains the story about the stunning blond and confesses that hes been sleeping with her most afternoons.

the wife looks frustrated with him only to retort, "theres no need to make us such fantasies, i know you played 36 holes!!!"

Fliper - received your email - and yes, to your question, no probs.

Updated...
______________________________
PAID 6 Fliper (5.9)
PAID 9 Markusantonius (8.5)
PAID 13 Predateur (12.9)
PAID 13 MG (12.9)
*** 16 Rayrac TBC?
PAID(by moi!) 17 PTHolden (16.9)
PAID 18 BobColby (17.9)
PAID 20 EWRobson (20.0)
PAID 21 Canary9 (21.4)
*** Still Available ***
*** Still Available ***
*** Still Available ***
______________________________
* Subject to Available Tee Times? *
* Subject to Available Tee Times? *
* Subject to Available Tee Times? *
______________________________

I was playing with a friend of mine once and as he was addressing the ball on the first tee, he noticed a funeral cortege proceeding slowly down the road alongside the first fairway.
Suddenly he stepped away from the ball, removed his cap and stood silently with his head bowed. Once it was past he put his cap back on and drove off up the fairway.
I remarked that it was probably the most respectful thing I'd ever seen done when he turned and said, "Well she was a good wife to me, all these years".

Alan's better with SEO jokes but Fundy has done well and added them to the kitty. Any more? The laughter volume was exceptional for marcus' joke; I'll try it on Mary (the joke, not the bed position!) before the event with the ladies; the problem with Fundy No 2 is that it might just open their minds to suspicious thoughts - alternatively we might get the oldest vets boasting about their sexual prowess which is an appalling thought.

edit

edit

Just got your message, Fliper - Yes, good to play - I will book us in.

Markus, I can tee off anytime after 12.15

OK, I will see what I can do, Fliper - but do not envisage any problems.

BTW I am playing tomorrow with Predateur if you want to join us, as well?

Sorry, got a job to do on tues. Dont mind if pred joins us on fri ,or others to make up a four.