Thought Id start this one going because its rather dead on this board at the moment and I suppose all my usual muckers are either at the Stella tennis event watching Dim Tim (lose again) or at Henly Regatta eating cucumber sandwiches (they wish,...NOT).

Anyway please feel free to just talk to yourself blast away and let it go on any company or subject you wish. Just wish Id thought of this one before.

cheers GF.

The last government left problems behind, and suggested at the time of the election it may have been a good election to lose.

But I think the social consequences that the present "governing" idiots are probably going to leave as their epitaph will create far more problems for them and the UK.

With a bit of luck Libya may detain the car sales man.

What about a Yellow Cross instead of Welfare Cards.

That would make them more obvious, and shamed them.

Perhaps, it could be extended to the plebs in the cabinet.

Who was that guy who had that rousing cheer at the Olympics.

Reuters News Agency
Release Date: 30 January 21:48:12

LONDON
STRIKING SUICIDE BOMBERS

Muslim suicide bombers in Britain are set to begin a three-day strike on Wednesday in a dispute over the number of virgins they are entitled to in the afterlife. Emergency talks with Al Qaeda management have so far failed to produce an agreement.

The unrest began last Tuesday when Al Qaeda announced that the number of virgins a suicide bomber would receive after his death will be cut by 25% next January from 72 to only 54. The rationale for the cut was the increase in recent years of the number of suicide bombings and a subsequent shortage of virgins in the afterlife.

The suicide bombers' union, the British Organisation of Occupational Martyrs (or B.O.O.M.) responded with a statement that this was unacceptable to its members and immediately balloted for strike action. General secretary Abdullah Amir told the press, "Our members are literally working themselves to death in the cause of jihad. We don't ask for much in return but to be treated like this by management is a kick in the teeth."

Mr Amir accepted the limited availability of virgins but pointed out that the cutbacks were expected to be borne entirely by the workforce and not by management. "Last Christmas Abu Hamza alone was awarded an annual bonus of 250,000 virgins," complains Amir. "And you can be sure they'll all be pretty ones too. How can Al Qaeda afford that for members of the management but not 72 for the people who do the real work?"

Speaking from the shed in the West Midlands where he currently resides, the Al Qaeda chief explained,

"We sympathise with our workers' concerns but Al Qaeda is simply not in a position to meet their demands. They are simply not accepting the realities of modern-day jihad, in a competitive marketplace. Thanks to Western depravity, there is now a chronic shortage of virgins in the afterlife. It's a straight choice between reducing expenditure and laying people off. I don't like cutting wages but I'd hate to have to tell 3,000 of my staff that they won't be able to blow themselves up." He defended management bonuses by claiming these were necessary to attract good fanatical clerics. "How am I supposed to attract the best people if I can't compete with the private sector?"

Talks broke down this morning after management's last-ditch proposal of a virgin-sharing scheme was rejected outright after a failure to agree on orifice allocation quotas. One virgin, who refused to be named, was quoted as saying "I'll be buggered if I'm agreeing to anything like that........it's too much of a mouthful to swallow".

Unless some sort of agreement is reached over the weekend, suicide bombers will down explosives at midday on Monday. Most branches are supporting the strike. Only the North London branch, which has a different union, is likely to continue working. However, some members of that branch will only be using waist-down explosives in order to express solidarity with their striking brethren.

1st of march round two of this debate on cards rather than cash for the unemployed.

I really am blazing mad about this.

I help out on a voluntary basis on a web site giving advise to those less fortunuate than us here.

Not only that but we have Id Smith (t--t)Now talking about paying claimants rather than landlords direct by another card????.

Where are peoples humans rights, what the hell is happening in this country now.

Workhouse next..... ration cards.

Notice how its all gone quiet on the Bankers etc etc.

The purpose of cards for benefits is that they can only be used for food and household items. Alcohol is not allowed. It also prevents people having the cash to spend on drugs.

The target group is drug addicts and alcoholics.

The systems has been tested very successfully in Australia and is now being rolled out across the country.

So the cards will start trading at a discount to face value - a bit like dvd players down the pub.

Exactly and cloned.

Wouldnt mind but the fat boy MP from YORKSHIRE who brought in the first card bill, looks like he could do with one to stop him getting the ale and pies.

Reckon we should also have one for Tory MPs , paid their salary by card and excludes any purchases down the Bullingdon club.

And what is wrong with the Bullingdon Club exactly?

https://twimg0-a.akamaihd.net/profile_images/2169287559/cameron1_bigger.jpg
Dave Camoron ‏@EtonOldBoys
Economy worst since the 1830's, 12 Banks downgraded, highest unemployment in 17 years, you can trust the Tory's with the Economy Hear Hear

GF.

Are you referring to Benny Hill’s reincarnation?

==============

Hays,

I have sympathy for the idea of benefits going to what the majority would consider the "necessities" of life and not into "drugs, tobacco and alcohol", but it won't work and the result will be stigmatisation of another group in society.

The latter is what this government seems hell bent on.

-------------

Isn't the Bullingdon Club a night club for delinquents in a peripheral town.

The club is not the problem, but its membership which seems to be for inferior "types" of adolescents, who never grow up seem to enjoy wrecking restaurants and pubs, doing little of use and some end up continue their behaviour by wrecking a country.

===================

Who drank all the Gunniess and ate all the pies.........



Wait on a minute havent we a duty under the coalition to pay for our own health costs if we are overweight?.

What about Ed Balls, he is getting pretty cubby?

Is the pickle saluting the leader?

Or is the leader looking for a safe haven for both of them.

You wan rice wiv that - Coventry taxi maker LTI sold to Chinese firm Geely for £11.4m

The company has acquired the "business and the principal assets" of Manganese Bronze Holdings (MBH), the manufacturer of the London cabs.

LTI in Coventry went into administration in October with 99 out of its 176 workers losing their jobs.

The deal, which it said will safeguard production in the UK, was agreed with administrators Pricewaterhouse Coopers.

Bit rich tho haystacks that guy telling unemployed people they can only have basic neccesities whilst at the same time hes leading life to the full. What happened to setting an example. !.

Interesting comments


http://www.guardian.co.uk/politics/2013/feb/01/david-cameron-eu-speech-poll

"David Cameron's EU speech did little to win new support for Tories, poll finds
Poll conducted by Lord Ashcroft gives Labour 38% support, five points ahead of Tories, and shows pro-EU sentiments bolstered

David Cameron's high-profile speech on Europe has cheered Conservative supporters, but done little to improve the party's chances of success at the next general election, according to polling conducted by the major Tory donor Lord Ashcroft.

The peer, who was Conservative deputy chairman until 2010, said Cameron's promise of an in-out referendum following renegotiation of the UK's EU membership after the 2015 election "has not unleashed a desire for an overall Conservative majority".
In fact the renewed debate about Britain and the EU in advance of the high-profile speech appears to have bolstered pro-European sentiments, with those saying they feel positive about British membership increasing from 18% to 22% and those thinking the UK would be better off out falling from 34% to 26%.

Ashcroft's poll – in common with most of those taken since last week's speech – showed a small increase in support for the Tories to 33%, but Labour remain in the lead on 38% with the Liberal Democrats on 11%. The UK Independence party (Ukip), which is committed to the UK's withdrawal from the EU, is on 9%

It is about people not wasting money on booze and drugs. Looks like a good idea. They might spend the money on feeding their hords of kids.

TORY CHEATS.....

@UKStatsAuth The original letter from @RachelReevesMP to Andrew Dilnot on misleading Tory claims can be seen here: http://www.labour.org.uk/conservative-party-political-broadcast-misleading-claims-on-debt%2c2013-01-24 …

http://www.labour.org.uk/conservative-party-political-broadcast-misleading-claims-on-debt%2c2013-01-24

Just posted on twitter.......

Rachel Reeves ‏@RachelReevesMP
Hugely embarrassing for Cameron that he has had to have difference between borrowing and debt explained to him