CLOSED - THANKS to all customers for the last few years

The phone's ringing; SOMEONE ANSWER THE PHONE PLEASE! (Rattle, rattle, sniff, sniff) I'm sure something's burning. I'm hungry (rummage, rummage) what's this, mmmm smells like fried bread. Owww! that's like a lump of rock. I'll try this, mm, um, a porridge frisbee? (Rattle, rattle, bang) HELLLLLPPPPP!

I can hear bees.

Oh dear, what a weird lot we have here. I pop in to top up the freezer and what do I find? Kim is trapped in a wheelie bin and Keaydian suffering from the cold. Oh well, that's life. I'll sort them out and get on with life.

I called in the local bee keeper and he has sorted the hive out, the bees were very upset so I hope no-one got stung, but still, the honey is very nice.

Now I must get on, must clean the windows because I happen to know it is daylight outside, though you wouldn't know it from looking at the windows. I don't think they have been cleaned since the blackout ended in 1945.

hello hello can you hear me? i dont know how to use the answerphone but i dont want a new bin

i am a lamb

i dont like pigs because they are very greedy

i like bees they are very nice and i like honey with grass

I like pigs, especially with roast potatoes.

WARNING
All external doors have been re-hung in order to open outwards. This is a fire safety measure to aid escape in emergency. See the nurse if you bang your noses when trying to enter the cafe.

I thought someone said they were going to get me out of here. HELLLLOOOOO!!! I'm still trapped in the bin!....................................................
....................................................................................................
Nobody? ...................... I can't hear the bees anymore.

Hmm, perhaps if I rock the bin it will tip over and the lid will fly open? Why didn't I think of that before?! Haha!! here we go! (shuffle, shuffle, rock, rock, rock, rattle.......tip..... crash!) Haha! done it! (Push, shove, heave, grunt) I don't believe it, it's still jammed. (Slither, scrape, slide) Oh oh, what's that? Noooo! we're moving! (Slip, slide) We're picking up speed, I forgot we are on a hill. It's a good job the gates are closed. (Slither, bump, slide) (Hoot, hoot! Screech!) Oh my God! Someone left the gate open, I'm going a lot faster! (Woosh!) Nightmare! I'm stuck in a bin doing 50 mph down the High Street!! It's not even insured. HEELLLPPPP! (Screech, hoot, hoot!) At least I've not hit anything yet. (Slither.........................silence) Wha...what's happening?! I've taken off! Oh, no.........I'm going in the river! (SPLASH!) (Boing!) The lid's open!! YESSSS! I'm free. But there goes KEAYDIAN's mobile home; it'll float out to sea :o( What am I going to tell him?

That's odd, I've never heard of someone insuring a high street!.

Well, because of the hazard aspect of a bin, it's cheaper to insure the High Street! :o)

WHERE'S MY BIN!!!!!!

ROAR

(Splosh, splosh, puff,pant) Phew, made it back. I'll just nip in to get dry (push,bang) OWW, by dose, I think it's broken, someone's been bessing wid the door; DURSE! Ah, there's KEAYDIAN.............wh..wh....why has he turned green? why are his strides ripped to shreds? Gulp. I think I could do with some of Lambykins's honey with grass.

Why has he turned green? He is still taking the "Ugly Pills", that's why.

zzz zzz zzz zzz......eh? What happened, why are my strides all ripped.


BUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNY.

Don't worry KEAYDIAN, something incredible happened but you'll be ok now. Here, have another pill.

If we can get 19 gold medals in Peking does that mean that the football team is going to start to win too?

Nice to see that some people still belive in miracles!

(thud)

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"If we can get 19 gold medals in Peking does that mean that the football team is going to start to win too?" Are you joking? We've only got 4 years; it'll take that long to teach them which direction to kick the ball in!

If we can manage to get a GB footie team together for 2012 and actually win it, then that should be 11+ gold Medals in one go

And an extra 1 for the team mascot. Probably a Beckham.

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