Thought Id start this one going because its rather dead on this board at the moment and I suppose all my usual muckers are either at the Stella tennis event watching Dim Tim (lose again) or at Henly Regatta eating cucumber sandwiches (they wish,...NOT).

Anyway please feel free to just talk to yourself blast away and let it go on any company or subject you wish. Just wish Id thought of this one before.

cheers GF.

No gin yet far too early in the day. Sorry cc but I couldn't resist that one!!!!!

Aye 3m dirty minds think alike eh :O)

The police are not allowed to shoot to kill in the UK. They don't specifically shoot to wound so that often it results in a kill. They shoot to stop. Just look at the two guys who were shot outside Woolwich barracks recently. They were both just injured.

3m
Do you know this one

"If I had known you were a virgin, I would have taken more time".

"If I had known you had more time, I would have taken my tights off first".

Blears the hypocrit. Cant stand this women, she shouldnt even be an MP after her expense fiddling.......... Mind compared to baldy ID Smith who invented this workfare with the other baldy.....

http://johnnyvoid.wordpress.com/2013/06/19/wages-for-interns-workfare-for-the-poor-says-hazel-blears-mp/

Word's of advice ........... and he should know, look at how he made the street's of London safer my going to war . well that is what he said.


http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/2013/06/19/blair-syria-intervention-arm-rebels-_n_3464070.html

I think he may be right about Iran

No Haystack I hadn't heard that one, they weren't invented in my earlier years!!!!!! Computer been at Drs. all afternoon - just go it back, sodding Norton I won't be using it next year.

Q: What do you do when your dishwasher stops working?
A: Slap her on the ass and tell her to get back to work.

A man is in a hotel lobby. As he runs to the front desk, he accidentally bumps into a woman and as he does, his elbow hits her breast.
They are both quite startled. The man turns to her and says, "Ma'am, if your heart is as soft as your breast, I know you'll forgive me."
She replies, "If your penis is as hard as your elbow, I'm in room 243."

A young couple took their two-year-old son to the doctor.
With some hesitation, they explained that, although their little angel appeared to be in good health, they were concerned about his rather small penis.
After examining the child, the doctor confidently declared, "Just feed him pancakes. That should solve the problem."
The next morning, when the boy arrived at breakfast, there was a large stack of warm pancakes in the middle of the table.
"Gee, mom," he exclaimed. "For me?"
"Just take two," his mother replied. "The rest are for your father

ha! ha! Like it.

Two dogs at the vet's.

Alsation notices that Jack Russell is looking glum so he asks him what's wrong.
I'm being put down said Jack
Why is that said Al?
I accidentally killed my owner's hamster, said Jack.
They're putting you down for that, said Al?
Before that I accidentally killed her guinea pig, anyway why are you here?
Well said Al, I was resting on the landing whilst my mistress had a shower, she came out wearing just a towel and as she passed me the towel dropped to the floor, when she bent over to pick it up I thought, I'll have some of that, so I did.
Oh said Jack, so you're being put down as well.
No said Al, I'm in for a nail trim.
2517

3m
I am old enough to remember the transition to tights from stockings. There was an interesting period when miniskirts were everywhere and most still wore stockings.

Haystack - 19 Jun 2013 18:50 - 26261 of 26261

There was an interesting period when miniskirts were everywhere and most still wore stockings............ends

My god make no wonder all these ancient male celebs are getting done.

It must have been hell holding back.

I get a stiffy when I see a female ankle.

its hapenning Bernankes speech coming out. DOW immediatly TANKS down..... I told you so.

Dollar is up and Dow pretty flat.

Speech not for another 10 minutes

I meant the minutes of his speech which are presented before he takes the stage.

As soon as they came out the DOW dropped to -80....... kapeche.

-72 now, up and down like a yo yo.

just all rather typical of current unpredictable and somehwat illogical markets - now -140 for no good reason other than a breather