Thought Id start this one going because its rather dead on this board at the moment and I suppose all my usual muckers are either at the Stella tennis event watching Dim Tim (lose again) or at Henly Regatta eating cucumber sandwiches (they wish,...NOT).

Anyway please feel free to just talk to yourself blast away and let it go on any company or subject you wish. Just wish Id thought of this one before.

cheers GF.

oh at least
both my parents smoked and i do not and even looking back the cynic line is good and strong on both sides of the family

aren't you lucky chaps
fred should escape in just a year or two as he's frightfully old already and already has to be wheeled to the shops by one of the daughters

I dont smoke, never have done.

Plenty of allergies mind which make up for it.

Strange but didnt have these until knoced down in a road accident.

You got 2 years on me then GF.... I had a thing for her when she looked more like this..

Just looking at Mel Sykes again, can you imagine that in black seamed stockings.

ohhhh shit her indoors is watching.

but sticky, you're diabetic i seem to remember
however, that is easily controllable with care as i'm sure you know

Shortie, shes still in prime nick.

Cyners yep you are right,

Thats more or less what Im pointing to.

Got taken out by a car and ended up in a coma for 30 days or so.

A few weeks later on tests found I had, Diabetics and a load of allergies.

Strange how life pans out.

Never mind I could be reliant on a Food Bank,

She sure is GF...

Cynic,

I don't mind them wheeling me to the shops.

What gets me, is that it is usually to second hand shops and I have to take a taxi to get home.

8-)

my dentist's daughter (and a boy in her school) also suddenly found herself with type2 following some sort of flu virus a few years back .... she's on one of these drip thingies

you mean they actually sell your chair from under you?
now that really is spiteful, and even an unsubtle hint

WOW Shortie you pervert.

All the same im going to blow it up and print off.

Thats going on the wall, no matter what you say Kim.

lol...

I'm trying to decide on which outfit would best suit my Mrs

All 4 0f them.

Her indoors is tracking me Shortie in the room next door.

Got to be carefull or no tea for me.

Get yourself a portable hotspot GF and see her try to track that!

LOL, yep but what about her dogs.

Think Ill start a Money am count down to Christmas..........

On the 21st day of Christmas my wife said to me.........

No scrubbers in the Armitage Arms, no chips on the way back, and a piss in the tree near the drive wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.

I can relate to that, wasn't long ago whilst drunk I tripped over a stupidly low front garden wall and got stuck in the owners forecourt bush..

By Anita Singh, Arts and Entertainment Editor
1:58PM GMT 04 Dec 2014
The BBC is confronting its critics in a new PR strategy, taking newspaper stories apart line-by-line. But is there anything the BBC forgot to mention?

The BBC has launched an offensive against its critics, publicly taking The Sun to task for questioning executive salaries and whether licence fee payers are getting value for money.

Director of television Danny Cohen took it further, asking journalists to stop criticising the BBC and engaging in a public Twitter spat with a reporter who had pointed out the number of repeats on television this Christmas.

In a new PR strategy, the corporation attempted to debunk The Sun's claims and circulated a rebuttal on social media.

But how do the BBC responses stack up?

*

The Sun said: “Nothing has changed at the BBC despite repeated scandals over its top executives’ staggering pay deals. Quite the reverse.”

The BBC said: “In fact since 2009 we’ve driven down the number of Senior Managers and the Senior Manager pay bill by over a third.”


What they didn’t mention: According to the BBC’s latest annual report, the number of managers paid more than £220,000 per year increased in 2013-14.

While the number of executives classed as senior managers has fallen, the number of middle managers in the tier directly below this has increased from 638 to 729, and average salaries in this band rose by six per cent to £77,308.

The BBC employs more people than it did a year ago despite a public pledge to cut staff numbers – up from 21,729 in 2012 to 22,039 in 2013. It has spent more than £650,000 on recruitment consultants in the past 12 months.

*

The Sun said: “Boss Tony Hall admitted last year the Corporation had ‘lost the plot’ over salaries. He said this without irony despite being on £450,000 himself.”

The BBC said: “Tony Hall said the BBC had ‘lost the plot’ on pay-offs and capped these at £150,000. He is paid 46% less than his predecessor was in 2009-10.”

What they didn’t mention: 12 executives have left the BBC in the past year with pay-offs exceeding £150,000. The BBC said these payments were “in the pipeline” before Lord Hall decided to introduce the cap. 71 employees left last year with pay-offs of at least £100,000.

*

The Sun said: “Hall’s finance chief says it’s ‘vital as much of the licence fee as possible goes straight to the programmes and services audiences love’. Quite so.”

The BBC said: “Because we’ve saved £1.1bn a year more of the licence fee goes on programmes and services which the public love.”

What they didn’t mention: The BBC wasted almost £100m of licence fee money on the Digital Media Initiative, a doomed technology project that Lord Hall scrapped within weeks of taking over. The Public Accounts Committee criticised the BBC for being “complacent” about the risks involved in the project and had presided over “a complete failure”.

*

The Sun said: Except [Anne Bulford, the BBC's finance chief] really means ‘as much of the licence fee once my own £395,000 a year is taken out of it’.”

The BBC said: nothing

What they didn’t mention: Anne Bulford was hired as the BBC’s managing director of finance and operations earlier this year. A former Royal Opera House colleague of Lord Hall, her salary and renumeration package is £395,000. She was given the job without it being advertised.

*

The Sun said: “The BBC is not a private company. It is handed nearly £4 billion a year from the compulsory tax on your telly. That could end when its charter comes up for review in 2016. Especially if it cannot show licence payers get value for money.”

The BBC said: “At just £2.80 a week per household the BBC provides excellent value for money.”

What they didn’t mention: 51 per cent of those surveyed by ComRes in July were in favour of the licence fee being scrapped. Sajid Javid, the Culture Secretary, says the £145.50 fee is a “large amount for families” and “needs to be looked at”.

*

A day after issuing its rebuttal of The Sun leader, BBC director of television Danny Cohen gave an impassioned speech telling journalists to be “less of the critical friend and a bit more of the friend” to the corporation.

In his speech, Cohen made a number of claims:

Cohen: “I believe that the BBC is one of the most important institutions in the United Kingdom. It is an intrinsic part of our democracy.”

What he didn’t mention: The licence fee is a compulsory tax for anyone who watches television. The BBC has warned that decriminalising non-payment would force it to close children’s channel CBBC and CBeebies if the number of licence fee evaders doubled.

*

Cohen: “It delivers education and deep joy and stimulation to 97 per cent of the population every month.”

What he didn’t mention: The BBC may reach 97 per cent of the population every month, but the corporation’s own research showed that “audience appreciation” for BBC One, BBC Two, BBC Three and BBC Four has fallen for the first time in years.

*

Cohen: “When you go abroad, the reputation of the BBC is singularly outstanding.”

What he didn’t mention: It’s fair to say that the BBC’s reputation is not very high everywhere in the world. The Argentinian ambassador to Britain has lodged a formal complaint about the behaviour of Jeremy Clarkson and the Top Gear team during their filming of the controversial Christmas special.

*

Cohen: “For audiences over the Christmas period we have an extraordinary line-up of talent to entertain you this year: Dame Judi Dench, Dustin Hoffman, Miranda, Brendan O’Carroll, James Corden and Matthew Baynton, Harry Hill, David Walliams, Julie Walters, Adil Ray, Michael McIntyre, Queen taking usinto the New Year, the residents of Albert Square, John Bishop, Peter Capaldi, a Strictly Special, Lee Mack, Carols from Kings, Miranda Richardson, Russell Howard, Imelda Staunton, Carlos Acosta, Victoria Wood, Darcey Bussell… and plenty more.”

What he didn’t mention: All true, but BBC One will show more than 100 repeats over the two-week Christmas period; 207 of BBC Two’s 281 programmes will be repeats. Prepare yourself for re-runs of To The Manor Born, Dad's Army and Celebrity Antiques Road Trip.