OK temporary accomodation for us ex-pats of Spacie's coffee house that is sadly now boarded up and in memory of Goldie's old pad the tearooms.

No fancy stuff, as this is temporary until we find a nice new place but it's warm down here with the fire and aga and I've organised a daily guinness, lager and wine delivery. There is a small kitchen in the corner and a few comfy cosy armchairs.

So feel free to take refuge when you need a break - self-service generally I'm afraid but when I can I'll rustle up a meal :>)

It's a bit dusty in here.

(Cough, splutter) Blimey it's KEAYDIAN! Good to see you. Your Guinness is over there under that cobweb. Um, I'm afraid the head on it is just dust, it's been standing for a few years!

Sorry.......who said that? Damn cobwebs everywhere.......aarrrchoooo

It's me, I'm over h........aagh eurgh! Pthfftpah! Just swallowed a spider!

(peers) Ooooh yeah.

Cleaners called in sic then, wot.

Yeah, I've advertised on the web for one. It's that web by the window.

You mean the web I'm stuck in?

Yes that's the one! Just make sure you don't cover the notice otherwise we'll never get a new cleaner.

WANTED!

CLEANER.

Hmm, needs to be a bit higher, that pile of dead flies is hiding the CLEANER bit.

Take a seat Mrs O.

Cup of cobwebs Hilda? Er, no.....I meant tea!

K I think it needs a flock of cleaners top sort this place out ;-)

Well it certainly needs a flocking good clean! :o)

Language Timothy

Sorry!

By the way, what has Hilda got in her hands? Is it a mop or a brush or.......?

A massive.........Panatela

Anyone got a match? Oh hang on, here's the postman. "Hev Yew Gotta Loight Boy?"

Hold ohn ah minute and one will check if you, one's old bean, have any post. 2 letters todeay. noh where is one's lightah wot wot? found it. press, press, press. Absolutely top hole - I have to say.

Can one ask ah questiohn? why aaare you, one's old bean, setting light to hilda's lavatory plungah? Goodness me!