Thought Id start this one going because its rather dead on this board at the moment and I suppose all my usual muckers are either at the Stella tennis event watching Dim Tim (lose again) or at Henly Regatta eating cucumber sandwiches (they wish,...NOT).

Anyway please feel free to just talk to yourself blast away and let it go on any company or subject you wish. Just wish Id thought of this one before.

cheers GF.

What

1. Preceded God...
2. Is greater than God...
3. Is more Evil than the devil...
4. All poor people have it...
5. Wealthy people need it....
6. If you eat it, you will die?

A wife asks her husband "Could you please go shopping for me and buy one carton of milk, and if they have eggs, get 6!"

A short time later the husband comes back with 6 cartons of milk.

The wife asks him, "Why the hell did you buy 6 cartons of milk?"

He replied, "They had eggs."

LoL
Pie?
regards
jkd

Like the labourer on a building site who was asked to get 20 Benon & Hedges and if they don't have them then anything will do.

He returned with a pork pie.

stan
In London the fugure is over 40% not returned censuses.

stan
Did you know that Lockhed Martin the US defense contractor is running out census and has all the data. Would they pass on data to the US government if asked?

http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2011/feb/19/census-boycott-lockheed-martin

They are welcome to my data if they want it. Nothing to hide.

Does anyone doubt that the US has free access to all data held by our government however collected?

H/S,

Yes, I did know about the LM connection and don't think much of it, but will probably still co-operate. 40%, is that higher then the last one in London?

Isaacs,

Always thought you a little vacuous!

8-)

Hays,

You could leave the country, I had last time.

Nobody would notice us missing.

Speaking of vacuous are you suggesting Hays jumps in a time machine back a few weeks so he can be out of the country on census day?

What would happne if you just said you were out of the country? I suppose you would have to fill in the census form to say that though.

Does the U.S have access to all data about UK citizens? I don't think so. They don't even have information on me in the U.S.

Last time I renewed my U.S. visa at the Embassy in London, I was interviewed in depth over the status of my businesses in the US and UK (that being the basis for my residency in the U.S.).

While the Embassy official had all the relevant accounts data about the UK company (because that is public at Companies House) he had no information whatsoever on the U.S. company, as that is private between the IRS and the company.

Despite all that, he still renewed my resident visa. :-)

ISaacs.

Tink a little!

Do birds of a feather flock together?
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-12296392

News of the World apologises for phone hacking scandal
The News of the World's owner has said sorry over the phone hacking scandal and is to set up a compensation fund.
Andy Coulson
Goodman
Rupert Murdoch
Glenn Mulcaire
Cameron has left the country.

Is he looking for Asylum if Spain?

Do birds of a feather flee the country together?

No wonder Cameron left the country. Clegg is looking for his bags to carry them.

Mind, Andrew Lansley is now in charge of the NHS should they need resuscitation, if he comes back!

(The latest I hear the Tories want the the Law and Order Ken Clarke to take over control of the government as he is an old boy! )

What a government, they know the quickstep's quick open reverse sequence.

When is the next election?

The Bird Feeder



I bought a bird feeder.

I hung it on my patio

and filled it lovingly with seed...

It was indeed a beautiful bird feeder.

Within a week we had hundreds of birds

taking advantage of the

continuous flow of free and

easily accessible food.


But then the birds started

building nests in the boards

of the patio, above the table,

and next to the barbecue..

Then came the bird sh * t!

It was everywhere: on the patio tiles,

the chairs, the table ...everywhere!

Then some of the birds turned mean.

They would dive bomb me and try to

peck me even though I had

fed them out of my own pocket.


And other birds were boisterous and loud.

They sat on the feeder and

squawked and screamed at

all hours of the day and night

and demanded that I fill it

when it got low on food.


After a while, I couldn't even

sit on my own back porch anymore

So I took down the bird feeder

and in three days the birds were gone..

I cleaned up their mess

and took down the many nests

they had built all over the patio.


Soon, the back yard was like it used to be ...

quiet, serene and no one demanding their

rights to a free meal...

Now let's see ......

Our government gives out

free food, subsidised housing,

free medical care, and free education

and allows anyone born here

the automatic right to full citizenship.


Then the illegals have come in by the millions.

Our taxes have gone up to pay for the free services;

small flats are housing 5 or more families;

you have to wait 6 hours to be seen

by a doctor in an emergency surgery

because it is filled with illegal non tax-payers;

your child's year 12 class is behind other schools

because over half the class doesn't speak English


Corn Flakes now come in a bilingual box;

I have to press one to hear my bank

talk to me in English, and

people waving flags other

than The Union Jack are

squawking and screaming in the streets,

demanding more rights and free hand-outs.


Its just my opinion but: maybe, just maybe,

its time for the government

to take down the damn bird feeder..

TIM,

Well done.

The true spirit of a little englander.

Mind the Cayman Islands are full of British tax dodgers.

Perhaps, you could move there.

Beckham shows us all just how easy it is......

as i recall it was said that King Canute was in the wrong place at the wrong time. can this be correct? is it a double negative?
i'm looking for a March low on a few of my holdings.
regards
jkd