CLOSED - THANKS to all customers for the last few years

Gawd Socs - yeah...very subtle.....

JM - how about farting in his direction?
Sorry...but seems drastic action is needed.......

bunny shouldnt that be 'Fart is his general direction...'

[King Arthur music]
[clop clop clop]
ARTHUR:
Halt!
[horn]
Hallo!
[pause]
Hallo!
FRENCH GUARD:
Allo! Who is eet?
ARTHUR:
It is King Arthur, and these are my Knights of the Round Table. Whose castle is this?
FRENCH GUARD:
This is the castle of my master, Guy de Loimbard.
ARTHUR:
Go and tell your master that we have been charged by God with a sacred quest. If he will give us food and shelter for the night, he can join us in our quest for the Holy Grail.
FRENCH GUARD:
Well, I'll ask him, but I don't think he'll be very keen. Uh, he's already got one, you see.
ARTHUR:
What?
GALAHAD:
He says they've already got one!
ARTHUR:
Are you sure he's got one?
FRENCH GUARD:
Oh, yes. It's very nice-a. (I told him we already got one.)
FRENCH GUARDS:
[chuckling]

ARTHUR:
Well, u-- um, can we come up and have a look?
FRENCH GUARD:
Of course not! You are English types-a!
ARTHUR:
Well, what are you, then?
FRENCH GUARD:
I'm French! Why do think I have this outrageous accent, you silly king-a?!
GALAHAD:
What are you doing in England?
FRENCH GUARD:
Mind your own business!
ARTHUR:
If you will not show us the Grail, we shall take your castle by force!
FRENCH GUARD:
You don't frighten us, English pig-dogs! Go and boil your bottom, sons of a silly person. I blow my nose at you, so-called Arthur King, you and all your silly English k-nnnnniggets. Thpppppt! Thppt! Thppt!
GALAHAD:
What a strange person.
ARTHUR:
Now look here, my good man--
FRENCH GUARD:
I don't wanna talk to you no more, you empty headed animal food trough wiper! I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!
GALAHAD:
Is there someone else up there we could talk to?
FRENCH GUARD:
No. Now, go away, or I shall taunt you a second time-a!
[sniff]
ARTHUR:
Now, this is your last chance. I've been more than reasonable.
FRENCH GUARD:
(Fetchez la vache.)
OTHER FRENCH GUARD:
Quoi?
FRENCH GUARD:
(Fetchez la vache!)
[mooo]
ARTHUR:
If you do not agree to my commands, then I shall--
[twong]

[mooooooo]
Jesus Christ!
KNIGHTS:
Christ!
[thud]
Ah! Ohh!
ARTHUR:
Right! Charge!
KNIGHTS:
Charge!
[mayhem]
FRENCH GUARD:
Hey, this one is for your mother! There you go.
[mayhem]
FRENCH GUARD:
And this one's for your dad!
ARTHUR:
Run away!
KNIGHTS:
Run away!
FRENCH GUARD:
Thppppt!
FRENCH GUARDS:
[taunting]
LAUNCELOT:
Fiends! I'll tear them apart!
ARTHUR:
No, no. No, no.
BEDEVERE:
Sir! I have a plan, sir.

[later]

[wind]
[saw saw saw saw saw saw saw saw saw saw saw saw saw saw saw saw]
[clunk]
[bang]
[rewr!]
[squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak]
[rrrr rrrr rrrr]
[drilllll]
[sawwwww]
[clunk]
[crash]
[clang]
[squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak...]

[creak]
FRENCH GUARDS: [whispering]
C'est un lapin, lapin de bois. Quoi? Un cadeau. What? A present. Oh, un cadeau. Oui, oui. Hurry. What? Let's go. Oh. On y va. Bon magne. Over here...
[squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak...]
[clllank]
ARTHUR:
What happens now?
BEDEVERE:
Well, now, uh, Launcelot, Galahad, and I, uh, wait until nightfall, and then leap out of the rabbit, taking the French, uh, by surprise. Not only by surprise, but totally unarmed!
ARTHUR:
Who leaps out?
BEDEVERE:
U-- u-- uh, Launcelot, Galahad, and I, uh, leap out of the rabbit, uh, and uh...
ARTHUR:
Ohh.
BEDEVERE:
Oh. Um, l-- look, i-- i-- if we built this large wooden badger--
[clank]
[twong]
ARTHUR:
Run away!
KNIGHTS:
Run away! Run away! Run away! Run away! Run away! Run away! Run away!

[CRASH]
FRENCH GUARDS:
Oh, haw haw haw haw! Haw! Haw haw heh...

I wonder if this guy has any idea what his sniffing has created?
LOL

I will try to take a sneaky picture of the sniffer of paris, otherwise the known as the man with no neck

I got his picture, will post it up over the weekend

Ohhh a marked man......

Jeff, it must be time for you to get over to the lounge at Gare du Nord for a few beers ;-)

over and out, on my way in 5

You may not have noticed, what with Jeffers and the Phanthom Sniffer, that I have been out for a while. Shopping called and it was necessary for me to obtain a birthday card for her-indoors, for tomorrow.

Also, today is our wedding anniversary and we are celebrating 43 years of marital bliss, so I had to be a bit co-operative, for a change.

Ahh happy anniversary Socs :>)))
A bottle of champers is put by for you in the fridge :>)

Happy aniversary Socs and Mrs Socs glad to hear its all been bliss ;-)

Mrs S and I have been together about 25 years but we dont have an anniversary as we are not really married.

Its Mrs S's birthday on Sunday and I have not yet got her a card, I have already bought her a present, however I wasnt brave enough to buy her the power drill that I really wanted ;-)

I should hope not Spacie! tut-tut.....
;>)
Its the time spent happily together that counts, not the formalities, well done on you both for managing 25 years - how has she done it?
;>)

bunny, I have absolutely now idea how she has done it ;-)

;>)

I see the old crowd are still about,nice 1 socs good on yer.

Tea please,afternoon bunny.

Yeah!!! Its Dave!!!! Tea just for you, but dont sniff whatever you do as JM is on the sniffy warpath ;>)

Hi bun,i will bear that in mind,must be all that fishing,and them worms..

Ha macca good result in spain !

bunny - I see you've begun to relax. You do realise that they can arrive at any time - day or night. You need to be afraid - very afraid.

As well as the usual, they are looking for dodgy habits - like re-warming 2 day old puddings, recycled tea bags, checking your licence to sell alcohol etc. They also work closely with the VAT man so I hope your books are in order.

Nothing gets past them I'm afraid .......

mg (Phantom EHO warning device)