Thought Id start this one going because its rather dead on this board at the moment and I suppose all my usual muckers are either at the Stella tennis event watching Dim Tim (lose again) or at Henly Regatta eating cucumber sandwiches (they wish,...NOT).

Anyway please feel free to just talk to yourself blast away and let it go on any company or subject you wish. Just wish Id thought of this one before.

cheers GF.

The bad conductor

Not certain if its a good idea to post just below the photo...............

This may be the solution for any1 who is very nervous about public speaking engagements !!


Sex 'keeps you calm'


Having sex before speaking in public could be one way of beating stage fright, a report has claimed.

During studies to assess the effect of sex on nerves, University of Paisley psychologist Ian Brody found people who have penetrative sex before appearing in public are less stressed and perform better. And the effect could last for up to a week.

For a fortnight Professor Brody asked 24 women and 22 men to keep diaries of how often they engaged in various forms of sexual activity. They also did various stress tests involving public speaking and performing mental arithmetic to assess how sex affected them.

Professor Brody, who published his findings in New Scientist magazine, found people who had penetrative sex were less stressed in public than those who engaged in other forms of sexual activity such as masturbation.

Even when he took into account work stress and partner satisfaction, he still found sex had the ability to de-stress the volunteers.

However, he said the de-stressing effect was not solely attributable to orgasm but could be linked to the stimulation of several nerves which takes place only during heterosexual intercourse.

He said the vagal nerve, which plays a role in controlling some psychological processes, and the release of a hormone called oxytocin may help de-stress and calm both partners.

He also said the long-lasting effect of sex on stress, could not be attributed solely to achieving orgasm.

"The effects are not attributable simply to the short-term relief afforded by orgasm, but rather, endure for at least a week," he said.

Let me see I have around three speaking engagements a week.........well thats what I will tell 'er in doors............either that or will move to Salt Lake City & take on 3 wives

Dunno about it relieving stress for public speaking, but you can improve your technique massively by inviting your in laws around to watch and discuss ways you could improve your performance.
Tried it myself once and that definitely didn't help to lower my stress.
Alan

Nice One......was it Jack & Vera.........

One afternoon a wealthy lawyer was riding in his shiny limousine when he saw two men along the roadside eating grass. Disturbed, he ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate the situation.



He asked one man, "Why are you eating grass?"



"We don't have any money for food," the poor man replied. We have to eat grass."



Shocked, the lawyer said, "Well, then, you can come with me to my house and I'll feed you!"



"But sir, I have a wife and two children with me. They are over there, under that tree."



"Bring them along," the lawyer replied. Turning to the other poor man he said, "You come with us, too."



The second man said, "But sir, I also have a wife and SIX children with me!"



"Bring them all!" the lawyer answered. They all jammed into the huge limo. Once underway, one of the poor fellows turned to the lawyer and said, "Sir, you are too kind. Thank you for taking all of us with you.



"Genuinely touched, the lawyer replied, "Glad to do it. Youll really love my place; the grass is almost a foot high!"

Brilliant !!.. :-)

nice one , baza.
i didn't know you had to pay to access the trader's thread. or should i have kept my mouth shut?

Evening all.
Don't know if you've noticed but there are a couple of more entertaining threads at the moment. Terrible I know, but check out the namecalling and fighting going on on SEO, DMR and pump and dump. It's hilarious!!!
What fun.
Alan

gets funnier by the minute, alan. so gald we're above it all ...............you tw*t ;)

I'm gonna get my dad onto you, an he's a copper.

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

That would match the little pink taffeta number I'm wearing now

Save some for me.

you having a "turtles head" moment there , driver?

I missed out on all that tonight you pair of twats !!!

Actually you three twats !!!!!

jimmy, inyerass with a black mambo strap-on, you great pillock!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You complete contents of a colostomy bag !!

Have a look at the pump and dump thread im going to invade it ..