Thought Id start this one going because its rather dead on this board at the moment and I suppose all my usual muckers are either at the Stella tennis event watching Dim Tim (lose again) or at Henly Regatta eating cucumber sandwiches (they wish,...NOT).

Anyway please feel free to just talk to yourself blast away and let it go on any company or subject you wish. Just wish Id thought of this one before.

cheers GF.

Funnily enough, yes it is MP.
Harks back to my days as a youth at the Post Office where the standard cup of tea looked and tasted like it was stewed in a builders welly for 3 days then 2 sugars were added along with the not too lumpy bits from a 4 day old bottle of milk and served in a mug, the inside of which was orange with tannine stains.
tea never tastes right now unless its served up like that.
Of course for bos it will be coffee, and lots of it, to keep him awake through the day. No need for any at night. The baby will see to that!!!
Alan

bugger!! just as i found a cure for my insommnia .......
a few bits of advice that i've been given:
1) don't look down ...... it could put you off for a while :)
2) take a good book ....... labour is dull.
3) wear shorts and a vest ....... apparantly it gets quite stuffy.
4) if she's struggling to push, flirt with the midwife and any nurses nearby .... gets 'em going again .
and finally,
5)take a box of tissues ....... virtually everyone has said you cry like a girl .

can't wait :))

chocolat, you didn't happen to get it on video , did you? :)

I nearly missed my first by going for Fish & Chips. The nurse came rushing in to tell me that it had all started and I better hurry up, so I wolfed my dinner down and ran back to the maternity suite, to hear the screams of the wife.
Typical, theres me with lousy indigestion, from rushing my dinner and she takes all the sympathy away by saying labour hurts.
Selfish bugger, she is.
Alan

1-Agreed! 2-don't count on it! 3-a wet sponge will do! 4-****! 5-don't follow babybooks labour advice as everyone's different and there's nothing worse than the book says you must do this etc! take 2 boxes definitely as everyone joins in!!
really pleased- along with you both.

Ha, no bos :P
but I did get through half a tube of arnica
... so far

One thing you've really got going for you bos, is the amount of knowledge experience and advice available to you through this board.
MP is right. Ignore the books.
For instance the section on bathing a baby is rubbish. All that supporting their head and not splashing and things.
I found the easiest way is to insert your index finger in one of the babies nostrils and your middle finger in the other. You can then swirl the baby round and give it a good rinse.
Best of all, you don't burn your hands if the water is hot.
Got loads of tips like that if you need any help.
Alan (official parenting advisor of Michael Jackson)

You'll also find the gas and air most effective bos.
It kept Mr Grumpy happy for a good hour before he emptied the tank :)

oooo cheers, chocolat!! forgot that one. :)

Another shitty post by Matt.

Check the investors room his sh*t on every thread what a child.

whos Matt????
What post????
Confused!!!!!

driver, nothing new there then. every thread already has shit on it :)

ice-cream , too?

Mmmm ... could've done with a load of that this morning.

I mean, how boring is arnica?

what were you doing? eating it?

Just to explain if you blinked you would have missed it, earlier we had some one posting very nasty pictures of sewage on all the threads. Well done M AM for taking it all off and a very fast ban.

Bling the Eskimo was fed up of always being cold, so he booked a holiday in the tropics.
After picking up his hire car he set off driving through the shimmering heat. After a couple of hours he noticed the car was losing power and mis-firing, so he pulled into a petrol station to call the local equivalent of the AA.
While waiting he noticed how stupidly hot it was and decided to buy an ice cream. As he ate it the heat caused it to melt dibbling down his chin and round his lips.
As he was finishing the AA man turned up and said "Blown a seal?"
"No", said Bling, "I've been eating an ice cream, honest."

Be careful with that sword.

http://www.glumbert.com/media/sword.html

still the king.

I don't know anything about music. In my line you don't have to.
-- Elvis Presley

Ma'am, I'm not tryin' to be sexy. Ah didn't have any clear ideah of trying to sell sex. It's just my way of expressin' how I feel when I move around. It's all leg movement. Ah don't do nothin' with my body.
-- Elvis Presley to a reporter early in his career, quoted in: Joe Kohut and John J Kohut, ed., Rock Talk (1994)

I'm not kidding myself. My voice alone is just an ordinary voice. What people come to see is how I use it. If I stand still while I'm singing, I'm dead, man. I might as well go back to driving a truck.
-- Elvis Presley, 1956


Deep in my heart there's a trembling question
Still I am sure that the answer gonna come somehow
Out there in the dark, there's a beckoning candle
And while I can think, while I can talk
While I can stand, while I can walk
While I can dream, please let my dream
Come true, right now
Let it come true right now

powerful stuff!!

(just having an elvis session)