Thought Id start this one going because its rather dead on this board at the moment and I suppose all my usual muckers are either at the Stella tennis event watching Dim Tim (lose again) or at Henly Regatta eating cucumber sandwiches (they wish,...NOT).

Anyway please feel free to just talk to yourself blast away and let it go on any company or subject you wish. Just wish Id thought of this one before.

cheers GF.

Just to explain if you blinked you would have missed it, earlier we had some one posting very nasty pictures of sewage on all the threads. Well done M AM for taking it all off and a very fast ban.

Bling the Eskimo was fed up of always being cold, so he booked a holiday in the tropics.
After picking up his hire car he set off driving through the shimmering heat. After a couple of hours he noticed the car was losing power and mis-firing, so he pulled into a petrol station to call the local equivalent of the AA.
While waiting he noticed how stupidly hot it was and decided to buy an ice cream. As he ate it the heat caused it to melt dibbling down his chin and round his lips.
As he was finishing the AA man turned up and said "Blown a seal?"
"No", said Bling, "I've been eating an ice cream, honest."

Be careful with that sword.

http://www.glumbert.com/media/sword.html

still the king.

I don't know anything about music. In my line you don't have to.
-- Elvis Presley

Ma'am, I'm not tryin' to be sexy. Ah didn't have any clear ideah of trying to sell sex. It's just my way of expressin' how I feel when I move around. It's all leg movement. Ah don't do nothin' with my body.
-- Elvis Presley to a reporter early in his career, quoted in: Joe Kohut and John J Kohut, ed., Rock Talk (1994)

I'm not kidding myself. My voice alone is just an ordinary voice. What people come to see is how I use it. If I stand still while I'm singing, I'm dead, man. I might as well go back to driving a truck.
-- Elvis Presley, 1956


Deep in my heart there's a trembling question
Still I am sure that the answer gonna come somehow
Out there in the dark, there's a beckoning candle
And while I can think, while I can talk
While I can stand, while I can walk
While I can dream, please let my dream
Come true, right now
Let it come true right now

powerful stuff!!

(just having an elvis session)

I missed all this baby stuff over the weekend ,, now when i had my boy ,my girl was very good ,she went in to labour ,didn't make too much of a fuss ,i sat in the corridor reading Boxing News ,then pop , it was all over ,and i had a son ,simple as that ,i then went out to wet the babys head with a few mates , she told me i had been really useful ,(at least i think that's what she said) and it was all happily ever after ..

you can forget about late passes with the boys too. you have to earn them. especially during the early months [about 6months is the norm]. As father to a 2yr and 6month old twins i am now an expert!![got my 1st late pass this w/end.. woohoo]

Wonder if we've got a mini-bos yet?
Rumour has it, bos was trying to set up a spread bet on the babys weight, with Sporting Index.

Al , is it due now ?? and if it is we should have bet on the weight here ..

Its overdue, Jimmy.
I'll go for 8lb 4oz.
I was gonna organise a sweepstake on the babys name but bos was too likely to win.

Speaking of names, I am facinated by the history and meaning of names.
Not knowing anyone elses real name on here I looked up Ian Tullet (MAMs glorious leader)
Apparantly Tullet comes from the ancient Anglo Saxon meaning strong, handsome, popular, wise, wealthy and sophisticated.
Ian comes from the old Celtic languages and means "not very".
Alan

Thats your free membership gone !! , Right if it's overdue ,i'm going for a heavy one ,put me in for 8lbs 10oz ...

Current list of entries;
Alan 8lb 4oz
Jimmy 8lb 10oz

First prize is 3 nights of babysitting, kindly donated by bos.
Any more entries?
Closing date is 30 mins before the birth.

8lbs 6oz for me,what happens if its twins is it the total weight :-)

Mega...

If that's the prize ,i'm going for Lightheavy weight , thats 12 stone 7 lbs .

bos tells me he has been trying to bring on the birth with curries every night, bumpy car rides and him having sex 4 times a day for the last week.
He wasn't sure how well it would work, with him being away from home in Amsterdam, but he phones every night and it still isn't here.

bugger!! sussed!!!
firstly, it's not twins, secondly the midwife has said it feels like a big 'un. thirdly , it's getting bigger by the day . the bugger's going to completely ruin things for me :( i mean, how do you compete with a babbi's yed????
speaking of which , i had a friend who went to london for a night out. feeling full of beer and hungry he went into a chippy and asked for a babbi's yed (pudding), chips and pea wet (mushy peas)..... and got stared at for about five minutes while they tried to figure out which county he was from !!!!
speaking of which, a couple from wigan go on holiday to benidorm to celebrate their 25th wedding anniversary. the wife decides to surprise her husband by making his favourite dish of meat 'n' potato pie, chips and peas. as he sits down to enjoy it they realise there is no gravy . hurriedly , the wife goes to the appartment next to them , knocks on the door and says to their neighbour, " 'ast any bisto?"





"i'm terribly sorry," says the neighbour, " i don't speak spanish ....."

Flat caps and mushey peas bos ,you should need a passport to come down here.. . Now if the midwife says its a big'un i might be in for first prize .

What a dour day for the market .

certainly is , jimmy. could do with cheering up here. anyone got any good jokes ?

It will all turn blue again tomorrow, just another one of those down days .
Horse walks in to a bar ,,the landlord says ,why the long face . Sorry.