Thought Id start this one going because its rather dead on this board at the moment and I suppose all my usual muckers are either at the Stella tennis event watching Dim Tim (lose again) or at Henly Regatta eating cucumber sandwiches (they wish,...NOT).

Anyway please feel free to just talk to yourself blast away and let it go on any company or subject you wish. Just wish Id thought of this one before.

cheers GF.

Into SEO to buy one???????????????
A matchbox model, I presume.
Did have the pleasure a couple of months back of driving the Jag JP1. Now that was a motor!!!

JAGUAR JP1



Last year I had a go of a xk 5.3 twin super-charge at a jag day, they let you take it out for half an hour on your own, I thrashed the balls out of it and scared the bloody life out of me yes it does shift.

driver, something like this ?

Bos
It was a bit like that, the funny thing was I had my son-in-law with me and he lost his bottle he put the palm of his hands on the inside of the window screen and was shouting Im going to die. That day sorted out the men from the boys.

you're a cruel man sometimes. :))

hope u like this, but eu is going mad!!

If it's humour you want, just take a look at the EU:

New English

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in plan that would become known as Euro English.

In the first year s will replace the soft c sertainly this will make the sivil servants jump for joy.

c will be dropped in favour of k this should klear up confusion and keyboards kan have one less letter.

There will be growing public enthusiasm in the second year when the troublesome ph will be replaced with f. This will make the words like fotograf 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, public akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expected to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.

Governments will encourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent e in the language is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing th with z and w with v

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary o kan be dropd from vords containing ou and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a rel sensibl riten styl.

Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united Urop vil finali und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.

If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl.

Smil I lafed ut lud!

im sorry you didnt like it, i thought it was very funny!!

Kivver, it would have raised a laugh here in Frankfurt, but I've seen it three times already.

I'm not sure Bos was referring to your contribution, though; rather just making a contribution of his own.

Didn't know you could read Japanese, Bos.

Or are you merely "turning Japanese"?

Eh?

changed it. thought it was a bit too risque for these boards.

I've got problems with my browser! Bosley, I promise you that a moment ago it appeared you had posted the fromt cover of a very saucy Japanese Manga comic on this thread. Now it has turned into a "Thug Rock" skull and crossbones.

Or have I simply been at too much of the orange squash again?

Aha, all becomes clear.

Thanks for injecting a moment of excitement into my day.

Can I have some of your orange squash please.

In the supermarket with his dad, a little boy was flipping a 10p piece into the air and then catching it with his teeth. Someone bumped the little boy at the wrong moment and the 10p came down and lodged in the boy's throat.

The boy starts to choke and his father starts hollering for help.

A middle aged man hears the commotion, casually puts his trolley to the side, straightens his coat and tie, and makes his way to the boy and his father.

"Excuse me, sir," the man tells the father. The man reaches down to the still standing (but still choking) boy, carefully takes hold of the kid's testicles, and squeezes gently but firmly.

After a few seconds, the boy convulses violently and coughs up the 10p, which the man catches in his free hand. The man releases the boy and walks back over to his trolley.

After making sure his son is ok, the father walks over to the man and thanks him profusely for saving his son's life. "I've never, ever seen anyone do that before -- that's absolutely amazing! Tell me, are you a Doctor?"

"Oh good heavens, no," replied the slightly embarrassed man. "I work for the Inland Revenue."