Thought Id start this one going because its rather dead on this board at the moment and I suppose all my usual muckers are either at the Stella tennis event watching Dim Tim (lose again) or at Henly Regatta eating cucumber sandwiches (they wish,...NOT).

Anyway please feel free to just talk to yourself blast away and let it go on any company or subject you wish. Just wish Id thought of this one before.

cheers GF.

Thats the style, Greek!!!!
A proper British Christmas. Brought a lump to my throat.
Glad to see your local primary has a nativity. Ours is advertising a "Non-mimetic play of international origin telling the story of the birth of indoctrination to a beleif system of dubious logic, scored for sitar".
The small print does say though that in order not to offend any of the local minorities (particularly those Christian types), the play will be performed behind curtains with the lights out.
Alan

Alan,

When I read your last line re...... performed behind curtains with the lights out.....I thought someone had snitched on me about my sex life.
Greek.

Woke up a bit worried this morning. I think I've made a terrible mistake with my kids. Just look at the role model I have encouraged them to look to. Santa.
I mean the guy sits on his arse for 11 months a year, probably claiming some kind of benefit, exploiting the vertically challanged with low wages and long hours.
On the environment he keeps his central heating on full and has hoards of reindeer producing masses of methane, so he can use them once a year, and then does loads of short journeys (house to house) which we are all discouraged from making.
Then to top it off, he spends a month encouraging children to sit on his knee, by offering them sweets and presents, then breaking into their bedrooms.
He ought to be on the sex offenders register, yet here I am telling my kids that this capitalist, bone idle, environment wrecking paedophile is a really nice bloke and they should learn to love him.
Anyway. A very merry Christmas to all on here.
Alan (&Trevor)

Merry Xmas from me also.

Look forward to Trev's outlook on life in 2008. Has he ever played the Stock Market? Is he really the Mr Big behind the East European sex trafficking? Merry Xmas and thanks for your postings.

Merry Christmas all and Trev, who I take it will get himself banged up for the night so's he can have a luxury Xmas dinner then sue the prison service for 10,000 when he swallows the 5p in his Xmas pud!

Merry Christmas to all from me.......

You're a fine looking lad, Jimmy!

Yep iv been dieting and working out all through December for this picture.

I am so sorry to spoil everyones new year, but I have discovered a reason to start euthanasing perfectly ordinary people.
Well, ordinary for a given value of ordinary.
Imagine the scene. You are driving through some leafy little village somewhere and you spot a car, parked slightly further from the kerb than you would expect a good driver to park.
I suppose, like me, you may tut a little and carry on. If you are a Guardian reader and a member of the local preservation society you may may write a strongly worded letter to the paper lambasting societys slapdash approach to parking and the general malaise of the country in terms of respect for others.
Thats fine. That merely marks you as a target of derision to local kids and slightly eccentric.
You may post it on an internet thread like this, that no-one reads. Again thats okay. It just means you are insane and without any kind of life whatsoever.
However if you stopped your own car, got out, inspected the rougue vehicle for the correct spacing on the number plate and an in date tax disc, you were obviously bullyed at school and have pscycopathic tendancies, and a feeling of hatred for everyone else on the planet.
If you then joined a website aimed at reporting this, complete with date, time, location and vehicle details you are dangerously psychotic, and for the safety of yourself and others you need removing from circulation.
You are a failed local councellor, and the kind of neighbour we all dread. You inspect every planning application within 20 miles and measure your neighbours grass length to ensure his lawn is never more than 1.5 cm long. You phone the police when you see a clean car during a hosepipe ban and never help yourself to toiletries in hotels. In short, you are a kind of methodist Napoleon, without the charisma and everybody hates you. And this only makes you worse.
Euthanasia is the only acceptable treatment for you, you ludicrous jumped up little turd.
This website exists, and I happened upon it this morning, while locked in mortal combat with a hangover.
It is HERE
Just one question.
Which is the most dangerous? The guy using his phone on the A40, or the Napoleon wannabe behind him taking note of his every move and writing them down so he can report it when he gets home????

just had a quick look at that site, alan. i did a search for bolton and i have to say i am gutted that i'm not on there. i mean, just how bad do you have to drive to get a mention ????


btw, happy new year.

All the best, bos.
I am thinking of an internet site to name and shame those who take up 2 spaces in supermarket car parks. That is an offence for which I would personally bring back hanging.
Alan

Seasons greetings all.
How about the fit people parking in invalid spaces and
childless people in the mother and children(cause there
is enough room to get my 4x4 in)

mac

Astonishing!

'Kev627' has snitched 275 times.


http://www.betterdrivingplease.com/passparameters.asp?Topic=NewSearch&SearchUserName=Kev627&AllTypes=true

They say (or use to)there are more out than in.
The frightening part is that there are people out there like Kev. There are people being murdered, raped, mugged etc and this guy is raging over this stuff:-

'Number plate was printed using square letters to read CAROL '

'This car followed me at nsl for approx 60 but grew impatient, overtook me and sped off into distance! '

'Driver pulled up alongside side me at roundabout and despite traffic on roundabout he pulled away and drove straight over just to avoid having to follow my minibus!'

Can anyone explain to me how Kev managed this?:-

'Overtook myself on a blind bend whilst I was at nsl '

Even Lewis Hamilton would have trouble with that manoeuver!!!

How did he know there was a child in the boot??!!

'This car overtook me on dual carriage way with a child crawling around in the boot!'

There really is something about people called Kev, isn't there?

Heres another one - TelfordKev - he beats Andover Kev with 367 snitches!

http://www.betterdrivingplease.com/passparameters.asp?Topic=NewSearch&SearchUserName=TelfordKev&AllTypes=true

:o)
You've started the year well!

Any resolutions broken yet? My New Year resolution is never to read or post anything on this thread again.................er, oh damn!

P.S. Thanks Alan - great site. I'll be steering clear (pun intended) of both Andover and Telford from now on!

Happy New Year all ,,,,, i can,t believe this safe driving site exists ,i intend to register sometime this week and will be posting . Lets see what mayhem we can cause ,i'm going to be complaining about some of the govenment vehicles ,traffic wardens who turn up in my area ,park on double yellow lines and book all the cars in the co op layby and also most of the local police ,anyone at the town council ,local mp's,, boy i'm going to have some fun with this.