I am so sorry to spoil everyones new year, but I have discovered a reason to start euthanasing perfectly ordinary people.
Well, ordinary for a given value of ordinary.
Imagine the scene. You are driving through some leafy little village somewhere and you spot a car, parked slightly further from the kerb than you would expect a good driver to park.
I suppose, like me, you may tut a little and carry on. If you are a Guardian reader and a member of the local preservation society you may may write a strongly worded letter to the paper lambasting societys slapdash approach to parking and the general malaise of the country in terms of respect for others.
Thats fine. That merely marks you as a target of derision to local kids and slightly eccentric.
You may post it on an internet thread like this, that no-one reads. Again thats okay. It just means you are insane and without any kind of life whatsoever.
However if you stopped your own car, got out, inspected the rougue vehicle for the correct spacing on the number plate and an in date tax disc, you were obviously bullyed at school and have pscycopathic tendancies, and a feeling of hatred for everyone else on the planet.
If you then joined a website aimed at reporting this, complete with date, time, location and vehicle details you are dangerously psychotic, and for the safety of yourself and others you need removing from circulation.
You are a failed local councellor, and the kind of neighbour we all dread. You inspect every planning application within 20 miles and measure your neighbours grass length to ensure his lawn is never more than 1.5 cm long. You phone the police when you see a clean car during a hosepipe ban and never help yourself to toiletries in hotels. In short, you are a kind of methodist Napoleon, without the charisma and everybody hates you. And this only makes you worse.
Euthanasia is the only acceptable treatment for you, you ludicrous jumped up little turd.
This website exists, and I happened upon it this morning, while locked in mortal combat with a hangover.
It is
HERE
Just one question.
Which is the most dangerous? The guy using his phone on the A40, or the Napoleon wannabe behind him taking note of his every move and writing them down so he can report it when he gets home????