Thought Id start this one going because its rather dead on this board at the moment and I suppose all my usual muckers are either at the Stella tennis event watching Dim Tim (lose again) or at Henly Regatta eating cucumber sandwiches (they wish,...NOT).

Anyway please feel free to just talk to yourself blast away and let it go on any company or subject you wish. Just wish Id thought of this one before.

cheers GF.

RING ANY BELLS?.I HAVE ALL THE POSTERS NAMES IN MY BOOK!

Hell, it's difficult enough trying to pick winners anyway without having this minefield to negotiate as well, thanks tabasco, good advice is DYOR.
2517

talking to myself i do wonder if it also applies in the opposite? i am supposing the opposite to a basher is a ramper, could be wrong.if i kept a book of such things, which i dont, i would suppose i would need 2 of them. 1 for bashers and one for rampers. maybe some might specialise in just one or other and appear in only one book. maybe some might appear in both books, so maybe i would need a third book? multiple aliases' are one thing, multiple bb postings are another.maybe some are so clever as to warn about such things whilst being just such thing. anyway i can trust me, i'm honest. LOL
regards
jkd

JKDthe clue is in the opening few lines

The Basher's Handbook
Reprinted here as a service to those who doubt this actually exists, or is simply an unfounded urban legend.

IS IT EASIER TO SCARE PEOPLE INTO SELLING THAN IT IS TO SCARE PEOPLE INTO BUYING A STOCK?
I have asked some knowledgeable investors this question and the answer is always: "YES, OF COURSE YES!"
----------------------------
I think I have your position sortedand please read the whole pieceyou have reacted in that same old fashioned way..

talking to myself
what is the opposite to scaring people into buying? hmmm! will have to think about this.
regards
jkd

Tabasco,

Good post. Sad but true.

No wonder the cost of passports are so high.

Don't you wish that you had written this?

You have to read it to the end!

This was actually taken from a UK passport application and a member of staff
copied it, as it made her laugh all day.

Dear Minister,
I'm in the process of renewing my passport but I am a total loss to understand or believe the hoops I am being asked to jump through.

How is it that Bert Smith of T.V. Rentals Basingstoke has my address and telephone number and knows that I bought a satellite dish from them back in 1994, and yet, the Government is still asking me where I was born and on what date?

How come that nice West African immigrant chappy who comes round every Thursday night with his DVD rentals van can tell me every film or video I have had out since he started his business up eleven years ago, yet you still want me to remind you of my last three jobs, two of which were with contractors working for the government?

How come the T.V. detector van can tell if my T.V. is on, what channel I am watching and whether I have paid my licence or not, and yet if I win the government run lottery they have no idea I have won or where I am and will keep the bloody money to themselves if I fail to claim in good time.
Do you people do this by hand?

You have my birth date on numerous files you hold on me, including the one with all the income tax forms I've filed for the past 30-odd years. It's on my health insurance card, my driver's licence, on the last four passports I've had, on all those stupid customs declaration forms I've had to fill out before being allowed off the planes and boats over the last 30 years, and all those insufferable census forms that are done every ten years and the electoral registration forms I have to complete, by law, every time our lords and masters are up for re-election. I served in the armed forces for more than 25 years including over ten years at the Ministry of Defence in London.
I have had security clearances which allowed me to sit in the Cabinet Office, five seats away from the Prime Minister while he was being briefed on the first Gulf War and I have been doing volunteer work for the British Red Cross ever since I left the Services. However, I have to get someone 'important' to verify who I am -- you know, someone like my doctor...who, before he got his medical degree 6 months ago WAS LIVING IN PAKISTAN...
Would somebody please take note, once and for all, I was born in Maidenhead on the 4th of March 1957, my mother's name is Mary, her maiden name was Reynolds, my father's name is Robert, and I'd be absolutely astounded if that ever changed between now and the day I die!

I apologise Minister. I'm obviously not myself this morning. But between you and me, I have simply had enough! You mail the application to my house, then you ask me for my address. What is going on? Do you have a gang of Neanderthals working there? Look at my damn picture. Do I look like Bin Laden? I don't want to activate the Fifth Reich for God's sake! I just want to go and park my weary backside on a sunny, sandy beach for a couple of week's well-earned rest away from all this crap.

Well, I have to go now, because I have to go to back to Salisbury and get another copy of my birth certificate because you lost the last one, AND to the tune of 60 quid! What a racket THAT is!! Would it be so complicated to have all the services in the same spot to assist in the issuance of a new passport the same day? But nooooo, that'd be too damn easy and maybe make sense. You'd rather have us running all over the place like chickens with our heads cut off, then find some tosser to confirm that it's really me on the goddamn picture - you know... the one where we're not allowed to smile in case we look as if we are enjoying the process!
Hey, you know why we can't smile? 'Cause we're totally jacked off!

Also how is it that illegal immigrants are allowed to stay in this country if they get in without a passport of any kind.

Yours sincerely,
An Irate British Citizen.

Greek LoL priceless, you would laugh if it wasn't true. Bring on the election!

Greekmanlife is but a game of chessand we are the pawns

JKDI dont give two shits if people buy or sell the companies I holdI am an investornot a traderI have all the time in the worldLeveraged
traders aintand that is why they act in the manner of The Basher's Handbook check all my postsdo I ever sound like a desperado?now check the groovy gangs posts you aint got to be Einstein to work out the rogues gallerywhen my Palestinian friend looked like he was pumping and dumpingI soon pulled him on ithe is a decant guy that wont take shithe just got a little excited? but you lot are farfar more dangerousI aint got bad feelings against you allin fact I get on ok with Dil and a few othersbut you are not exactly clever in your tactics and only con the L platersthe Handbook covers your every moveoff out nowwill read you predictable reply at six oclock tomorrow morning.

tabasco - One thing puzzles me, if you are an investor and not a trader why are you up at 6am to watch the markets? doesn't make a lot of sense to me. Surely market conditions as they are at present has to favour the day trader only because of the uncertainty prevalant today. As long as interest rates remain low there would appear only one place to put your money? Come the election and the subsequent cuts and interest rises which are inevitable stocks are going to get hammered don't you think?

t
i post and admit that i am often wrong. you first came onto this board telling us how you were NEVER wrong, you seem to have changed your mind since, how humble.
maybe that so called groovy gang you mention were able to put you in your place.
it is said attack is best form of defence.so why do you attack me? suggesting i con newbies. that is simply not acceptable to me. you well know that is a bull to a red flag to me and i shall respond.
the proof of the pudding is in the eating.hope you earn a few bob from my reply.
please all dyor
regards
jkd

.

Lawyer gets some law. Triple law, actually.

Car park crash lawyer was over alcohol limit
Northampton Chronicle
19 March 2010

A top barrister crashed into a parked car while arriving for work at Northampton Crown Court before staggering off to represent a client, a court heard.

Grant Goodlad, a former president of Northamptonshire Law Society, was seen reversing his Jaguar into Steven Howard's car, getting a pay and display ticket and then walking "unsteadily" into court.

He now faces the possibility of being disbarred as a barrister and struck off as a solicitor by the Law Society after being disqualified from driving for two years, which could be reduced if he attends the impaired driver course.

Goodlad pleaded guilty at an earlier hearing.

Julie Costello, prosecuting at Northampton Magistrates' Court yesterday, said Mr Howard's Ford Focus was left with bad scratches along one side following the incident in The Mounts car park at 10.30am on February 9.

She said: "When speaking to police, Mr Howard said the driver smelled strongly of alcohol and appeared unsteady on his feet. He was seen walking off towards the crown courts."

Police officers established the Jaguar belonged to 53-year-old Goodlad, of Welford Road, Thornby, at which point a tannoy alert was made within Northampton Crown Court appealing for the barrister to return to the car park.

Mrs Costello said officers described him as "unsteady walking and appeared very drowsy".

She added: "He said to officers that he had to return to crown court because he had business there representing a client, and repeated this request later."

A breath test taken showed Goodlad had 98 microgrammes of alcohol in 100 millilitres of breath, almost three-times the drink-drive level of 35mg.

Murray Holmes, defending, said his client conceded he had "a drink problem" and added Goodlad had already taken steps to address the issue with the help of his GP.

He appealed for magistrates to be lenient, adding: "My client said during his interview that he had ruined his life, and I hope for his sake that he has not, but it is altogether possible that he has.

"He has to consider the catastrophic effects his actions may have on his future.

"He is not in double jeopardy but in fact triple jeopardy.

"He has to face up to this court's actions, in due course, the decision of the Bar Council in which he could be disbarred, and thirdly, the Law Society's decision as to whether he will be struck off or not."

Presiding magistrate Kevin Foreman ordered him to complete 40 hours of unpaid work and pay court costs of 80.

The majority of tabasco's post can equally be applied to rampers (a tag he achieved whilst touting that well known disaster MDX).

pth
thats 2 of us, no doubt t will come up with some story about "us" being part of the pack.never mind him being the leader of opposition. after all wasnt it him who appointed the cabinet?
by his own admission he is a multiple bb poster under multiple pseudonyms'.so although i know i am not you i dont know who is t and who is anyone else. all by his own previous bragging admission.
no doubt a very acceptable and logical sidestepping answer will follow at 6am tomorrow.
of course if the confusion he creates continues with further posts then the more he may earn,if that be the case. just my opinion as always and please dyor
regards
jkd

just re read last few posts.
how dare he suggest such a thing?
how dare anyone, but how dare he of all people?
i am so angry.
will sleep on it and no doubt feel better tomorrow.
regards
jkd

Good morning all>

Well The Bashers Handbook certainly ruffled a few featherslet me just say this for the time beingthis thread is full of genuine people that share their viewsthe dozen or more that I call the Groovy Gangappear out of the hat like one of Paul Daniels fluffy Rabbits the moment any person questions their motives
HOW TO IDENTIFY A BASHER..5. Bashers do work in teams (sometimes themselves as a team). So be suspicious of someone showing up and automatically having a Shadow to converse with who supports their argument.
JKDgrow up sunshine! did I ever mention your name as one of the gang?you were the one that popped up out of the hat and posted!!! you took it for granted that I was including yourselfwhat does that tell everyone?I have posted thousands of times on AMwith companies like barcftobvicmdxjdwblnxlloyrsapxstanmksoxb.please highlight just a couple of my post where you believe I have ramped the stock upfor instance predicted a lot higher SPcertain financial gain in the short termand so onthen I will find several hundred post where the Gang posted SPs were sure to go down 50% or moretrying to scare the shitand with some aggressively predicted pennies for our investment...and asking us to sell and "move on" best of luck on that
ChrisI am an investortrust me!I am up at six for a number of reasonsmy wife works in Londonand the family has to get up early her choice...I do odds compiling in the racing industry for myselfwork/playthat takes around one hour per meetinglike to get that out of the way long before mid-dayin between I take the dog for a walk up the lane to get papers and a baguetteI do follow the markets closelyalways looking for a long term investment
I have been sharp to many on these bbsincluding yourselfask fred how I gave him a hard time until I could prove he can be trusted but once I get a comfortable handle I embraceI could tell Greek was a good unnamrehgeorgefredexectimjimmy.and most of this threadif you think I am the villainthen that is your choicebut I sincerely want all investors to make moneytraders beat each other up for short term gain.for every winner there has to be a loserif they can scare a few investors to part with their moneythey have done their job.

Several years ago (probably about 20) I was in a Police Cell block, (now called a Custody Suite, as this sounds better and not so intimidating to our misguided, misunderstood toe tags, sorry I meant clients) when a lady had been arrested for 'drunk driving'. This lady was well over the limit and requested that her husband be informed. He (a Solicitor) turned up at the Police station more drunk than she was. As their home address was about 2 miles away and he arrived within a few minutes, we obviously wondered if he had driven there. A Police Officer had seen him drive into the station yard, so he was breathalysed and found to be also well over the limit. The result both were banned for 12 months.

All through my career I found most Solicitors fair when it came to dealing with the Police as long as they were put in their place (many Police Officers were intimidated by a Solicitors presence especially the newbies), but there was always the bolshie, obnoxious git who tried every trick in the book to get even the worse scum bags off the hook. The Solicitor who was arrested at the station was one of of those obnoxious lot so it made my day when he was banned.
OK I know it's a job (Solicitor) but it takes a particular type of person to go all out to defend the indefensible. Most faced with such a person with overwhelming evidence go through the motions, just doing what they have to and no more.

Another quick Solicitor story.

Violent youth arrested, put in cells, requests Solicitor. Solicitor attends, prisoner put in interview room with Solicitor for private discussion, prisoner still handcuffed. Solicitor demands handcuffs to be removed and prisoner allowed to smoke. As Custody Officer, I refuse stating I think the prisoner is still a risk, Solicitor pushes his augment and starts on about 'He will make a complaint'.
Although willing to ignore him, I think 'OK' on your head be it.
Handcuffs removed, cigs and a light given, both left alone. Few minutes later hear commotion. Enter room, Solicitor lying on floor bad gash to head (he had been smacked with ash tray) taken to hospital, few stitches.
Sometimes you just have to laugh.

Tabby,

Be careful who you lump or group me with, I could end up being offended. Very offended , you may have notice how I wilt at the thought.

But, I have to say that having had 4 children I am used to unruly children to deal with.

Have a nice day.

A plea,

Not taking anyones side, just that this used to be such a friendly, none back biting thread. Lets keep it that way, 'PLEASE', otherwise it will just become a platform for insults, and the like, and most regulars will start to ignore it.

greekman re 'Handcuffs removed, cigs and a light given, both left alone. Few minutes later hear commotion. Enter room, Solicitor lying on floor bad gash to head (he had been smacked with ash tray) taken to hospital, few stitches.' He learnt a valuable lesson that day---smoking is bad for your health, serves him right eh!
2517